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June 20, 2007

Comments

Anna

Sorry you're having a rough time at the moment. Hope you can endure until your equilibrium finds you again. (And the little patchwork pup was beautiful, too.)

Amy Jo

I'm sorry to hear of your struggle, the loneliness and desperation. It is something I am all too familiar with. I know that I am a stranger, but I am thinking of you and sending you warm thoughts. I know it isn't always possible, especially when you have young children, but if you can, please take a bit of time for yourself.

Sarah

I'm most definitely skirting the valley floor these days too. Pity that having company down here doesn't elevate us all to higher terrain.
The most common phrase from the "I Ching" (or Book of Changes) has been rattling around in my brain a lot of late. "Perseverance furthers." One can only hope it's true.

carlene

Oh, how I despise the state of flux! Just gotta keep remembering, the one thing you can always count on, things will change. Another stranger sending good thoughts your way...

Camilla

Greetings, crafty-mama. I keep checking up on you... I have five kids (oldest turns 12 next month)and so I have some experience at child-induced craziness. My doc gave me xanax, which I only take at full dosage on 'bad days'; about three times a month. Oh, do I have stories about THOSE days, everything from a child nearly drowning, one let herself out(fell out!) of the car in an intersection, (in front of three police squads, no less), oldest daughter 'took off' at the ripe old age of four to a neighbor's house 4 blocks away... wow, I sound like "mother of the year", huh? If you need to grouse at someone, I'm your girl... e-mail me anytime. I guaratee you cannot shock me. Best wishes on maintaining order, peace, and sanity. I hope everything is going okay today. Keep posting. And keep breathing. minutes add up to getting through the day... *hugs* Cami

Alicia A.

Sorry you're feeling blue, Alison. May better times find you soon.

Sasha

Alison, I wish I could say just the right thing to help you, because it's pretty clear that you are asking for help. If I lived nearby I'd come over and take the kids off of your hands and give you some time. To rest, but also to be yourself without your kids for a while. It's such a struggle sometimes (OK, a lot of the time, at least for me.) These are some of the hardest years (and days that feel like years!) Please hang in there and try and find a few moments to take care of yourself in the midst of taking care of everyone else.

Claudia

Sending peace and compassion your way. Balance comes from within, so if you can take a few moments to simply be and breathe, please try. Life is so hard, and so fast, but you have others to turn to.

Strength and peace be with you,
x

UNIFORM Studio

Sending good thoughts your way.
Email me if you need to "talk", I'm always here to listen.
xoxo

Lee Ann

With you all the way, Alison...I wish I was closer. I'm thinking of you and sending good vibes.

Helen Shields

You don't know me from Adam but oh we sound so similar in many ways. I have three children 7 years and under.I have suffered low points since getting married and having children. Last year was a bad year for me, selling our home to move took 9 months, a husband serving overseas for 4 months of that with no help for me, a returning husband posted 600 miles away and only home at weekends, a young son very screwed up emotionally over the above, finally a new home close to husband only to have him posted again after two months to where he is away during the week again. In all of this I lost me, I wanted to create, produce to make myself have some self worth but I was to knackered emotionally and physically to cope. I beat myself up emotionally about having a good life, healthy children, loving husband and being selfish for not just getting on with it. The answer, not found one yet, I still get bad weeks, last week was very weepy but the good weeks are getting more and more. A friend once said to me, give yourself a break why do you have to be all those things you mark yourself as at once and to such a high standard. I just do I guess I feel I have failed in the mother, wife, crafter stakes if I don't. Does anyone notice this NO just me. I take baby steps and be selfish every now and then take time for me because I have found it does help in the long run, it is just hard finding the balance. Baby steps try to achieve one thing a day and be happy you managed that, and not one big thing either, just get the washing machine on or sit and play with the children. I will stop rambling now because I am not sure any of this makes sense. But you are not alone we all have periods with young children when we just want to run like hell in the opposite direction. Love to you and your family may they help you through this and be strong for you.

lera

I hope you start feeling better soon. Take it easy.

allie

Keep on knitting, it's such a great outlet for your current state of flux. I'll be thinking about you, sending good thoughts in your direction. I hope you're feeling better soon. Otherwise, you've got support in all of us.

Clare

I wish I knew what to say. You don't know me and i'm on the other side of the world - but I'm sending you a big hug. i'm not in your situation but i'm no stranger to the feelings you're expressing and I know it's really important that you are expressing them out loud. I really really hope things swing back up for you soon.

wren

I'm sorry that you are struggling and hope you find a way to ease your pain.

Alice

I am sending you love and courage from the other side of the world. It may not reach you for a while because it has a long way to travel but it will arrive one of these days. Until then be kind to yourself. Everything else can wait until the sun shines again.

Mama Urchin

I really hope the sun breaks through your clouds soon.

Beth

The demands of small kids sometimes makes me forget who I am (not superficially but really down deep). I can sort-of spiral, especially when it's just me providing the everything. I always want someone to give me permission to let go of the "shoulds" and the dishes and the guilt and even the resentment. So if it matters just a little bit (or brings a slight smile) I give you permission to let go of all of those things.

Sending you my good thoughts...

KT

Gathering familiarity around me. Oh that sounds so wonderful. That was a big reason to move back to Seattle from Virginia- we really did not want to handle the diabetes, a new locale AND a new job. 2 out of 3 was enough. As I find myself back in this place that I have moved to 3 times (!) I find my self elated and also alone. Last week was a particularly bad week. Just know that you are in my heart and if there is ANYTHING that I can I do, I will. Even if it involoves luxury leather goods. Or maybe, especially so.

kirsten

thinking of you, alison. and thank you for your honesty - it obviously touches many, many people. xx

liz

there is nothing wrong with wiping clean and starting anew. in fact i find that sometimes it helps...

keep on keepin' on, you'll find yourself on the other end soon enough.

rebecca

Allison,

You don't know me, and I only know you from your blog. Your post today moved me. Thank you for your honesty. I imagine that I've felt something similar to what you're feeling now. For me, the important thing to remember is that you do resurface, even if it takes much longer than you wish. Sometimes you have to push through the days.

All my best. You are an inspiration.

Martine Booth

I'm glad you are back, but sad to hear its been a rough 10 days.

I have been going through my own state of flux for the last 3 months: retrenchment, husband unemployed, house move, sister's wedding, mum diagonised with breast cancer, and me turning that milestone of 40. Thankfully no children to deal with!

What I have learnt to do in my moments of loneliness is reach out – to connect with kindred spirits. That's how I found you, via your blog, and then lots of other crafty girls via the blog sphere. I don't feel so alone, and am much more optimistic that I can turn my long-neglected design skills into an income-producing lifestyle.

All the other messages before me have said it already. Nurture yourself, reach out for help, knit and reconnect with your creative soul within. So far its working for me. And my mum would tell you to have a nice cup of tea!

belinda

Oh Alison, hold on, by the skin of your teeth, hold on.
Life is tough and sometimes even after trying so hard,all we get is a shit sandwich.
And parenting is the hardest job in the world, especially on your own.
But you know this- and it doesn't make the everyday practicality of your life easier now, today.
Does your mother live close by?
If she does, ring her and ask for her support- she will understand exactly how you are feeling.
Or a close friend? Please don't do this on your own Alison.
I hope it's a tiny comfort to you to know lots of people are thinking of you, and understand how you are feeling.
Sending you courage and comfort.
And a good nights sleep. x

TBers

Cheer up charlie (think Chocolate Factory), sending big hug your way.....
believe me, things do get easier eventually and then you look back on days like these and wonder how things got all blown out of proportion.

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