six and a half stitches

EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK

I'd like to be 2 again where I can paint myself, run my hands all through it, and get immense enjoyment out of the whole thing.

I'd wanted to write a post where I said thankyou to everyone who left comments this week, and to tell you that indeed the week got better and everything is rosy and I'm smiling and humming and skipping along the street.

But I'd be lying. Because this week just kept on with the same as last week. I've dealt with presentations I have no idea about, staff I've no idea about, clients I've no idea about, battled with antibiotics, almost went back to the hospital because they just weren't working (I'm still withholding judgement on that one), done a talk tonight for a young designers forum, turned up to a dinner I wasn't looking forward to in tears, spent way too much time thinking about whether the anitbiotics were working, felt awfull all week, got quite anxious a number of times about pretty much everything, and I think that's enough for you all to get the general idea on My Life At The Moment. I sincerely hope next week is indeed better.

And I have been incredibly suprised, and taken back by all the wonderfully kind comments, some of them in particular really hit home for me, and every single one of them was read with meaning by me, and, well, gosh, this is a great little community. Thankyou.

However, none of this means I have been resting on my arse, (no siree, actually that's part of the problem...not enough stop-what-you're-doing time) and I have things to show.

First, another pincushion. This was made with an old linen woven napkin, and some Florence Broadhurst fabric that I picked up a couple of weeks ago.

The embroidery is from 'New Style of Sashiko' embroidery book, and the buttons are ones I've had lying around in my collection.

Next up, can you guess what this is from?

It's a hello flower from Aranzi Aronzo (don't get excited, I made the happy flower bit up), and is part of a much bigger picture which is amazingly fantabulous stuff - I love it and it's quirkiness and boy do they ship fast:

Retail therapy is legit, right? Better be, because I did more therapy sessions today as well, but only for basic stuff - nice, cute, even vaguely exciting stuff, but basic stuff - you know, the stuff you don't feel bad about cutting up.

3 lots of cotton prints, 2 lots of cotton flannel, 3 lots of wool blanket felt. All for stuffed toys. And a thwack of books arrived over the last couple of weeks. I'm going to organise an ISBN photo thingy if anyone is interested in the japanese craft books (well everyone else is doing it, I might as well too - Wee started it, and it just snowballed from there and there's links all through the craftblog world).

I also finished the Manos Scarf but I need to block it and I'll post that seperately.

And I finished all my postcards for the Postcard Swap and scanned them all and sent them all off to their new homes. If you want to sneek peek on them, they're all up at Linework.

And I've been writing up sewing patterns for back-tack  - can I just stop and say both Nic and I are so excited we met our 100 person limit and that so many of you have joined and want to be a part of this. Please - go wish Nic good wishes as she ploughs through all the names matching people up with people and more people and you'll get your partners emailed through very soon.

Umm, yeah, I think that's it. Bit tired now. On tomorrow's list, just for you Di, World Peace.

IT DOESN'T RAIN IT POURS

If you want a happy post, you may as well go and read somewhere else. Because I've had it from all sides in the last week, and I'm shattered. Completely and utterly shattered.

I've had to re-evaluate my position at work and decide whether to take on something else which could work spectacularly, or fail spectacularly.

I've had to make the decision sooner than I thought as a crisis came up, and its still a crisis, and will be for a little while longer, and I'm walking around in the dark.

I've been pressured and pulled and slapped around the head a few times with steel bars pretty much every day. My head hurts.

Relatives descended over the weekend, which is fine normally, just not when I'm trying to think through a number of crisis.

My body gave up on me, and I had fun in the emergency department of the hospital last night. You have no idea how much time has been consumed with me thinking about this over the last week. Me, anxious? Never.

Today the crisis continues and the work which was supposed to be done for me hasn't been. Could someone please switch the light on, it's very dark in here.

And there's more, but some of it isn't for posting.

So anyone else want to take a swipe at me - come on, I love being beaten to a pulp. I thrive on stress. I'd love to curl up in bed. I should be in bed. Just need to solve all the problems in the world and I'll be OK.

HAVE YOU SIGNED UP YET?

Have you signed up for back-tack yet? Yes? Brilliant! No? What are you waiting for, go do it, now, leave your coffee, sign up, before the deadline closes.

OOOH, SCARY MONSTER

Another little critter who lives behind the vases and bowls. He's very shy. And he has very big teeth, and should probably go see a dentist. He's quite afraid of the prowling cats, but likes to hum along to the theme music for Busy Buses.

This definately falls into the experimental category, and my tendancy would have been to bin this, but I wanted this to be part of something bigger and be part of a progression. This is incy wincy tiny sewing, and depending on how I feel, it may just get put in for this month's A Month of Softies.

MY YOU ARE A HAIRY ONE AREN'T YOU

Little things lurk amongst the objects on my shelves, waiting for a quiet moment to come out and peek at the large world around them and bask in the warmth of April sunshine. Ssshhh - if you make a noise they dissappear as quickly as they come, scuttling back to the safety of the shadows and the left over spaces in between bowls.

FLO IS A TOP CHICK

Sometimes working three days a week has its drawbacks - I'm the last to know pretty much everything going on in the office, the last to know about trade events, and the last to know about sales...

Until today.

The little gasp of glee when the email was opened was quite audible across my section of the office. Florence Broadhurst prints, fabrics, wallpapers on sale at Signature Prints. Above is half the amount of a wide piece of Egrets and flora which may become a large wall panel in the study.

This piece really is as subtle as it's photographing, with beautiful japanese inspired fan prints of flora.

And there was more, but I'm keeping some things a suprise.

BRAMBLE BERRY PIE GETS CROSS STITCHED

It's unusual for me to hold out for long periods of time. Occasionally I do, but usually I jump in with a what the heck attitude which is born of a complete lack of any sort of patience on my part. This one took a long time, but has been worth the wait.

Manos in Quail colourway, which quite nicely matches a skein of slubby wool from Martas Yarns courtesy of Di. There's loads of subtle blues and greys in the Manos, picked up also in the slubby, and accented by the browns and greens. I kind of have something earmarked for this, but am 75gms short of required wool. I could wing it...

Manos in Bramble which is actually much darker then shown, but this never seems to show up in any of the photos I have ever seen of this colourway, so you just have to believe me. I'm doing the Cross Stitch scarf pattern and feeling pretty darn happy I've now got 3 more stitch styles under my belt.

WHEN CRAP BECOMES EXPERIMENTAL

Over the last week, I've had two seperate conversations about posting, and whether I would post about something I'd done which I thought was crap. My first answer was always No! Why on earth would I want to do that? Why would I want anyone to see my fuck ups. I am perfect. My blog says so.

But it got me to thinking. Would you think any less of me if I published a pile of, what can only be described as spew, when some things have gone disastrously wrong? Wouldn't it be nice, if people showed off their mistakes, as well as their triumphs? Because out of the crap comes experimentation, and from there we produce something wonderful eventually, and the process is what really intrigues me.

This leads on from a few internet discussions (which, because I am sooooo organised, I have the link for here) around the place about creative expression and where we get our creative rocks off from. This notion that we all 'borrow' from one another, bounce ideas from one blog to the next and come up with something different, more experimental, more creative or whatever from one starting point. Which is where back-tack got born from - the idea you give someone a starting point, and see what they turn it into, and collectively we create even though the starting point was the same and the creativity is manifolded by the fact we don't choose the starting point.

Which brings me around to Linework - the little exercise in letting go of restrictions in my ability to publicly show my artwork, and to free up some of my stilted finger muscles to draw without fear of reprimand, or to perform, or for recognition. I'm finding it hard. And I find it's so dependent on my frame of mind, and that drawing while not feeling so great just doesn't work for me. Yet really that should be the best time to do it - to express something contained within. Littered around the house are various stages of things being developed for it, waiting for the boost of energy to finish them, and feel connected to them in some way.

And then after all these conversations, I realised - fuck it. Just draw. Let it come naturally. Who cares anyway? Somewhere in each drawing is something magical, even if I have to crop the hell out of it to find it. I need to learn to fall in love with concepts again, and take what I need, when I need it, from wherever I need it. If the experiment fails, it fails, but not because I didn't try. So go have a look throughout the week.

This week, is all about experiments.

PIN UP CHIC

Right at this very moment in time, I am very obsessed with texture - pincushion soft quilted texture. Freeform texture of stitches on fabric, layered with padding and wadding, against contrasting fabrics. Simplicity of detail, and intricacies of threaded patterns.

This is an experiment for a few things I have lined up looking at 3D pincushions and quilted objects. It will also be up on the back-tack site as part of a pincushion pattern sheet for those participating.

THIS WEEK WAS BOUGHT TO YOU BY -

100's and 1000's.

• Despite whatever I said before getting pregnant, letting my child out in public wearing his pyjamas is now perfectly acceptable to me if it keeps the peace. No, I haven't succombed to nappies on the outside of the pj's, but when he's toilet trained, I may see things differently.
• 100's and 1000's, fairy bread, biscuits and chocolate cake are highly nutritious in the right quantities.
• 100's and 1000's are hard to sweep up off the floor. They roll everywhere.
• This seemed like a great idea at the time:

• Buttons are a fantastic toy to give a child under the age of 3. They develop coordination - the child learns to throw them everywhere. They develop creativity - just how far can one throw the buttons everywhere. They develop cunning, instinct, and a keen eye for mother's patience - gee these buttons go a long way when thrown really hard. The develop imagination - the buttons go even further if I throw them in a container, really hard. And they develop the notion of cause and effect - oh no, the container is empty, I need more buttons, mummy fill it with more buttons, now, look I now have a full container of buttons I can throw, and so it goes.
• Volumetric capacity of a nappy to hold sand = infinite.

It's been a long week.